I drove home, straight from the airport. I was sure that my wife would be at home and son would be out to college. I had a solid desire to have sex. I quietly opened the door of our three BR flat and went to our bedroom on the first floor of our penthouse flat. I could see my wife anywhere. I thought, she would be in kitchen doing some work. I went straight to shower. After having a lengthy batch, I put on shorts and T shirt. When I was about to call my wife, I heard my wife talking to my son in the adjacent bedroom. They were laughing, as if sharing some joke. I slowly opened the bedroom door and peeked inside. My wife and son were sitting side by side on the bed. They were having a look at our old album. I did not disturb them, having seen them engrossed. Suddenly, I saw exclamatory expression on his face and embarrassed expression on face of wife. I suddenly recalled that album contained some old photographs, which I had taken when we were newly married. I had taken snaps of my. The reality was that it was a physicalreminder of a part of my psyche I had barely begun to explore before it scaredme. It scared me so badly I ran to the first "safe" man I cameacross and married him. Live and learn. It's been a few years since then, and now I am free of the"safe" man. I'm unpacking boxes in my new apartment, where I'malone again for the first time in nearly ten years. New town, new job,new home, new life. With a sigh I look down at the belt in my hands. I'vedoubled it over as I would to strike someone - myself - with it. Theleather is still supple despite spending the better part of a decade instorage, and near the buckle, the stains of my momentary lapse in common senseremain, darker now than I remember. The phone rings and I stand up to hunt for the handset. Ileave the belt on my bed and start rooting through the assorted boxes near thebed, getting progressively closer to the dratted handset. The answeringmachine hasn't been hooked up yet, which is just.
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